See if you’re an idiot, in three simple steps!

Here’s a test to find out if anybody online is an idiot. It’s just three simple questions. Note: Somebody will be tempted to respond to this post with the acronym in question. That doesn’t make you clever. It just makes you stupidly obvious.

1. Do you know what TL;DR means?

If you can answer no to this question, congratulations! Jesus loves you, the Buddha regularly takes your phone calls, and the IRS probably doesn’t even know who you are. In case you want to shatter your ignorance though:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Too_long;_didn%27t_read

2. Have you ever posted Tl;DR as a response?

Yes, sarcastically and ironically count, though you get a pass to the next question. I don’t care that you’ve actually not read something you consider too lengthy, we’ve all done that. What I care about is that you’ve posted TL;DR, broadcasting this to the rest of the world. If you have, and meant it, stop right here, you’re a complete fucking idiot. How you manage to breathe needs to be studied by the government, so please, go volunteer right now. Note also, this isn’t an objection to criticizing the length of a post or such, that’s just advocating concise writing, which you can only truly do when you’ve read the writing in question.

3. If you’ve posted it, ironically or otherwise, have you ever wanted to respond to somebody else posting it, YS;FY? Do you think YS;FY should be the official response? Will you start using it and advocate that others use it as well?

If you can figure out what YS;FY is, congratulations, you’re not an idiot. If you claim you’ve posted TL;DR seriously but can still figure it out, you’re a lying bastard, pure and simple. The fact that you need to broadcast your minuscule attention span to the world means you’re incapable of the thought necessary to decode simple acronyms. If you think it should be the official response, go to it, this is the internet, and change begins with you.

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